Eat, Pray, Love
Watch, leave, vomit.
Dinner for Schmucks
The French film Le dîner de cons, adapted for American audiences (all the intelligence, subtlety, and wit was removed). Starring the painfully unfunny Steve Carell, widely considered one of the leading comedic actors of our time.
On the eve of a holiday weekend a young negro (played rapper Bow Wow) learns he has a winning $370 million lottery ticket. For the next three days his neighbors and relatives in ‘da hood’ try to steal it from him while the audience yells things at the screen.
Lottery Ticket 2
Set six months after Lottery Ticket, a young negro (played by rapper Bow Wow) declares bankruptcy after having squanderd $370 million. The audience yells things at the screen, eventually his corpse is found in a dumpster.
Scott Pilgrim vs. the World
A hipster who looks like a homosexual fetus (Michael Cera) attempts to win the heart of a girl. Based on a comic book read by hipsters who look like homosexual fetuses.
Step Up 3D
“A tight-knit group of street dancers team up with Moose and find themselves pitted against the world's best hip-hop dancers in a high-stakes showdown that will change their lives forever.” Essentially the story of my life. I give Step Up 3D four boogaloo shrimps out of a possible five.