13 August 2014

News Fruit & Misc.


Still no demand for Polish apples in Ukraine.

The 'Jack' of All Fruits - The Indelible, Edible 'Jackfruit'.

Thomaston Man Arrested After Stabbing Watermelon.

Blackface Is Big in Germany.

Actor-Explorer Hunting Fawcett Appeals for Aid; Albert de Winton Says He is Held by Indian Tribe.

10 comments:

  1. My Dear Sir - I always come to you to see the news that no one else is willing to print.

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    1. I've been trying to interest the Ukrainians in the indelible, edible 'jackfruit', so far with no success.

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  2. If only a black-faced Fawcett had travelled to Ukraine bearing jackfruits. The world would be a different place today, and a better one.

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    1. That's true. I often pause and think "If only there were a program sending minstrels and jackfruits into trouble spots," then I go back to drinking.

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    2. Alas, since a blackened face is so integral to the art form, it would be difficult for a minstrel to sustain his minstrelry after being beheaded.
      A jackfruit "surge" might be more successful, although I fear our enemies abroad would just use them for target practice.

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  3. OT (yet somehow cosmically relevant...)

    BBC: India brides leave husbands' homes for lack of toilets

    Six newlywed women in a village in the Indian state of Uttar Pradesh have returned to their parents because their husbands' homes had no toilets.

    Must've been a shocking discovery. Is toiletlessness grounds for divorce? (If not yet a word, it ought to be.) Was there at least toilet paper? Or is that optional when there is no actual toilet? As you may agree, the casual reader can have many questions after reading a story like this.

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    1. The men of Khesiya village must be really, really, lazy. Maybe I should move there, I would fit right in.

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  4. Fez: Stealthily blanketing an area with jackfruits at night could be effective. I know it would scare me if that's what I awoke to.

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  5. this one was made for ADC:


    An Italian senator is seeking an exorcist after being "cursed" by evil African spirits in revenge for calling Italy’s first black minister an orangutan.

    a
    http://www.thelocal.it/20140828/ive-been-cursed-by-evil-african-spirits-top-politician

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    1. "He later claimed he was a “misunderstood animal lover” and refused to resign. But that explanation failed to convince the prosecutor of Bergamo, who ordered him to stand trial for defamation aggravated by racial discrimination. The trial is ongoing.

      After a spate of bad luck - including undergoing six operations, losing his mother and last week finding a 6ft snake in his house - Calderoli told the weekly gossip magazine, Oggi, that African spirits have plotted against him in revenge for the insult."

      He also might get prosecuted for killing that snake, which animal rights activists claim is a protected species.

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