Marshmallows

Now, more than a dozen deaths later, Newsweek says the Quran desecration story they reported wasn’t true. (Notice no major media outlet is denying that nearly all of America’s celebrities enjoy wiping their asses with pages torn from the Quran, and it seems the Mohammedans continue to be unaware of this practice.)

Reflecting on the amount of agitation resulting from the flushing of one Quran down a toilet it occurs to me we may have overlooked a valuable tactic in our clash with the Mohammedans. Why not tell them that if they don’t behave themselves, we’ll get as many Qurans as we can, stack them in a huge pile, and light it on fire? It’s worth a try, and even if it has no effect on the manners of the Mohammedans children could take advantage of the blaze to roast some marshmallows. I will forward the idea to my confidants in the White House.