Banana Emergency

Scientists warn a putrefying fungus could wipe out the banana industry "in the near future", which reminds me I should finish the mystery novel I've been writing about Bananas Foster, a mentally unstable private detective whose investigation of the suspicious death of a noted pastry chef exposes a cover-up that goes all the way to the top.


  1. I only clicked on this article because it gave me an excuse to hum Yes, We Have No Bananas in my head.

  2. So what will we call banana republics in the "near future"? Guava republics?

    1. If we wait the universe might compress itself into a small, hard ball before we ever have to deal with that conundrum.

    2. Wait, maybe the compression effect will keep the horrid banana blight at bay?

    3. I'm not a physicist, but it seems like it would bring it really close. Along with everything else.

  3. Renowned liar Johann Hari once wrote that the existence of banana diseases shows that capitalism is wrong, or something:

    Presumably phylloxera shows the same thing.


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