Oh my honey do come and hurry to the Zoo

Obese Woman Referred to Zoo for MRI

In other stupid news:

A man was injured when he jumped from a car traveling 55-60 mph in an effort to retrieve a cigarette blown out of a passenger-side window.

Why did this man act so foolishly? The authorities explanation is the man has an excessive fondness for cigarettes. But I think there is another explanation. From an early age American children are bombarded by anti-littering propaganda. It has no effect on most, but some individuals are more susceptible than others, and in his drunken state, this man’s conditioning took over. I’ve long advocated that large diameter ashtrays be placed every 50 yards or so along the highway. Perhaps this man’s near death will finally spur our stupid government into action on this matter.


  1. It's also good to know that you will only be injured should you decide to exit a car traveling 60 mph.

  2. darn...another failure of Natural Selection.


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