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More Brief Reviews of Movies I haven’t Seen
Brokeback Mountain: A love affair between a pair of homosexualist cowboys ends tragically when one is killed by a horse . The actors playing the leads are (supposedly) straight. Includes graphic sex scenes. If you are into this sort of thing stay home and rent the spaghetti western Django Kill...If You Live, Shoot! instead, it's a weird and entertaining film that includes an honest depiction of homosexualist cowboys - an entire gang of them. Memoirs of a Geisha: A trio of Chinese honeys infiltrates Japan by disguising themselves as whores. The potential of the premise squandered, as unlike the homosexualist cowboy film Memoirs of a Geisha is only PG-13. The Producers: A pair of real life homosexualists (Matthew Broderick, Nathan Lane) portray heterosexual Broadway musical impresarios. Notice the pattern. Do you understand 'Hollywood logic' works now? King Kong: I’ve decided the old-style stop-motion animation is better than tedious modern CGI effects. The latter mechanical
Are friends electric?
The Japanese have invented a robot for the home, named RI-MAN, capable of carrying a life-like, realistic sex doll in his robot arms. This is a tremendous breakthrough for feeble and lazy perverts of the life-like, realistic sex doll persuasion, who no longer have to get out of bed. In the future RI-MAN the robot may also be used to care for Japan’s elderly, so RI-MAN has been programmed to distinguish eight different kinds of smells. I’m guessing one is doo-doo smell, one is that weird old people smell, and one is banana pudding smell. That leaves five smells I’d rather not try and guess. In the future, experts tell us, America will use Mexican immigrants to take care of her excess elderly, and that with a little training many of them can be taught to distinguish as many smells (ocho) as RI-MAN . I wonder if this preference for Mexicans isn’t motivated by robo-phobic bigotry. It’s claimed Mexican immigrants are cheaper than robots. Perhaps, but look at RI-MAN’s hands - he could
On holiday?! Bloggers don't need no stinkin vacation! I mean, you can't record random ruminations on a laptop, while indolently lying poolside, nursing a cool, refreshing drink with a little umbrella in it?
ReplyDeleteIs Craptocracy on holiday as well? That blog has so much potential.
ReplyDeleteFunny how Carter's posting has become so infrequent lately. I've long suspected he's secretly behind the "Stuff White People Like" blog...
I'm not the Stuff White People like guy, and I have the bank account to prove it.
ReplyDeleteI haven't been posting because I've been tired. There's been nothing much at Craptocracy for the same reason, and for the fact that paying attention to our presidential candidates is like staring into an abyss.