Another girl, another planet

According to the committee of the International Astronomical Union the solar system has three new planets - Armand, Luis and Angel. But I refuse to acknowledge them, as this ‘discovery’ has the stench of a publicity stunt, the work of a group of bored and undistinguished scientists trying to draw attention to themselves by redefining assorted space rocks everyone’s known about for years as planets.

The scientists themselves admit that because of the new definition: “dozens of objects as small as 400 kilometres in diameter that orbit the sun could be designated as planets in coming years,” Which means that additional new ‘planets’ are sure to follow, and sure enough the committee is already threatening to invent six more in the near future: Sedna, Quaoar, Igoo (which everyone knows are merely iceballs) and Vesta, Gloop and Tundro (which everyone knows are only large asteroids).


  1. It's all part of a process in which science will eventually discover that the earth is the center of the solar system, and the only place where there are . . . scientists.

  2. I will admit, the idea of a Planet Gloop does have its appeal.
    Ed Wood would no doubt approve.
    "Helmsman, set a course for the savage alien Planet Gloop, which is where the savage aliens live".

  3. It sounds good until you get there and find the "planet" is about the size of the world's largest ball of string.


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