A squirreled pate will grow bald

Possibly a sign of the apocalypse, squirrels are going bald in Kansas. Local authorities are urging calm and are seeking volunteers willing to approach bald squirrels in the wild and daub Rogaine on their heads. Contact the Kansas Department of Wildlife and Parks in Wichita if you would like to help.


  1. Surely these squirrels would be better off shaving their heads and growing a goatee like other baldies do?

  2. At least it should be warming up. Even in Kansas.

  3. Good idea, Fez. Or give them hats.

    Eh: Are you saying bald squirrels are a sign of spring?

    Squirrels. This is a new low, though everyone is lucky I didn't write about that recent brutal donkey attack on a child.


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