I stopped trying long ago

In Science News: Research Could Lead To Better Drugs And Whiter Whites. The genius behind this breakthrough, Professor Nigel Scrutton, is, predictably, already being attacked in certain quarters for ‘racism’.

And it isn’t just Scrutton; certain Leftoids have accused the Duke Lacrosse team of racism for hiring a black stripper. Of course we all know these cretins would call men who refused to hire a black stripper racist as well. There’s no pleasing these people, which is why it’s best not to try.

Which is what my advice would have been to golfer Tiger Woods for handling the sham-controversy he recently found himself embroiled in. As I’m sure you’ve heard already:
“asked about his play on the last day at Augusta, Woods replied: "I putted atrociously today. Once I got on the greens, I was a spaz."

The British-based disability organization Scope, formerly The Spastics Society, said of Woods' comments:

"Although in the US the term 'spaz' may not be as offensive as it is here in the UK, many disabled people here will have taken exception to his likening a golf stroke to that of 'a spaz.”
This is sheer idiocy.1 By any objective measure, even at his worst Tiger Woods putts exponentially better than the best spastic golfer. Therefore by comparing himself to a spastic, Woods was, in effect, paying spastics a tremendous compliment.

It’s a characteristic of our times how so many people, not just spastics, are offended by compliments. Try complimenting a woman for having lovely tits, for example, and see what it gets you. We are embroiled in an age of easy affront.

1It saddens me to criticize The Spastics Society, since part of The Spastics Society's mission is helping spastics get drunk, something I fully support.


  1. Don't believe what you hear. Girls still like it when you tell them they are hot. Trust me.

  2. I suspect it's the word 'tits' that sets many of them off, which is why when paying a compliment it's better to go with "milk jugs" or "fleshmelons".

    Did you click the 'helping spastics get drunk' link? Because if I didn't know better I would say that guy in the photo is making fun of spastics.

  3. 'Whiter whites', for the uninitiated refers to cleaner washing. Such a shame that this simple fact seems to have been misrepresented.


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